Empowering Leadership Through Self-Care:
Insights from Dr. Deidre Douglas

Deidre Douglas, Ed.D. earned her doctorate in Leadership Studies at the University of Lynchburg focusing on the effects of physical activity on the academic performance of elementary-aged students. She is a Les Mills US National Trainer, Assessor, and Presenter and Les Mills International Presenter and Content Design Editor. Dr. Deidre has worked with numerous YMCA organizations since the age of 16, first starting at the Altavista Area YMCA and currently working at the YMCA on Old Forest Road. She has currently launched the first video on her YouTube channel, Wise Owl Wisdom, Energy, and Bliss, where people will find tips for success in life for fitness enthusiasts, leaders, and anyone creating a fun and healthy lifestyle. She enjoys traveling, cooking, reading and writing, creating music, painting, and hiking.

 

The Interview Transcript

Hugh Ballou:
Welcome to this episode of The Nonprofit Exchange. We’re at #438. It just seems like I started this yesterday, but this one is exciting. It’s a dear friend here who lives in Lynchburg, Virginia. And I said, hey, why don’t you come on the show? And let’s talk about self-care, but it’s a lot more than self-care. So this episode of The Nonprofit Exchange, you can find with all the others at http://TheNonprofitExchange.org, T-H-E, nonprofitexchange.org. We’re talking about self-care and fitness for leadership, and how to be more effective. And so, Dr. Deidre Douglas, welcome to the Nonprofit Exchange. Please tell people a little bit about yourself and your passion for your work.

Dr. Deidre Douglas:
Well, thank you, Hugh. I am truly excited to be here to share some insight and wisdom based on my professional and personal experiences. I have been in the world of public education and fitness for about 30 years. And I chuckle when I think about that, Hugh, because 30 years, that’s quite an amount of time to be connected with two different entities. And I love it, absolutely love it. I started as a health and PE teacher, positively impacting children. from the ages of four through high school. And while teaching public education, I decided, you know what? Adults like to play too. Let me figure out how I can play with adults. And I became a personal trainer and group fitness instructor. And from there, just evolved. I’ve had a stint as principal, assistant principal, and public education, at elementary age. kids, and working with the adults there. I’ve also coached a myriad of sports, and officiated sports, and now I work for a non-profit, YMCA of Central Virginia. And I have to say, Hugh, I’ve always been connected with a non-profit since the age of 16. We won’t tell you my age now, but I’ve worked for YMCA associations since the age of 16, and I just find that it’s wonderful being connected with people of all ages and that’s why I’m here.

Hugh Ballou:
Oh, and you can tell if you’re watching this episode, or you’re listening to it, this woman is energy. She impacts people’s lives in multiple ways. Let’s talk about your leadership position at the Y. That’s where we connected. And what I have noticed, and I’ve said to you, and this is what we teach in Center Vision, the culture is a reflection of the leader. And I’ve been to a lot of organizations, but the one where you’re the leader, I’ve noticed in the culture, there’s just a great spirit in the culture. So talk for a minute about what is your conscious mindset when you know that you’re leading a group of people and that you’re gonna raise the bar on their performance and their attitude.

Dr. Deidre Douglas:
When I came into this particular association, the culture was there, but I could feel that we needed a little bit of a shift. Shift in the energy and just true, genuine connection from person to person. As a leader, in leadership studies, my doctorate is in leadership studies. It’s from the University of Lynchburg. Learning through that time in my life, and then also reflecting on some of the leaders I’ve had the opportunity to work with when you reach people one-to-one behind closed doors, really understand who they are, where they want to go, it’s easy to support them on their journey, and then it makes it easy to hire and seek out individuals who fit the culture. We here are a small, close culture, so we look for hiring individuals who fit the culture, who have energy, and who genuinely want to support others, but also want to take time to support themselves. And that’s an important key. We have to know who we are to be able to be of service to others and to provide growth opportunities for others.

Hugh Ballou:
And I saw that from the very first minute and I go three times a week and it’s always consistent with that gracious, inviting attitude. And if people are having a bad day, We don’t know it. We don’t know it. They deal with it. They just show up. And I have a really good personal trainer there. And one of the choral conductors I’d studied with called choir rehearsal attitude adjustment. And I said this is my attitude adjustment. I feel better when I leave than when I come in. And that does not happen by accident. So fundamentally, I see leadership as influence. And so I see the influence of what you’re just talking about. Now, I want to point out that if you’re for the attendees, a lot of these great soundbites, these great ideas are going by and you may not catch them all. There will be a full transcript of this with all of these great things that she’s telling us at thenonprofitexchange.org. Just look at self-care, leadership, and fitness. So let’s go into that topic of Leadership and fitness, it’s under, I think, the umbrella of self-care. Maybe you do, okay. Why is it important for us to work on ourselves and our physical selves?

Dr. Deidre Douglas:
Okay, so we could go into a deep study about the brain, the chemicals, the hormones, all of those good things, and I see you chuckling there, we could, but it really comes down to serotonin levels, cortisol levels, understanding those, and then understanding oxytocin. So when we think about self-care, we do things that release those feel-good hormones so that we feel competent and confident about who we are and what we bring to the table when we work, and then we can share that easily with others. Now, the interesting thing about what you’ve mentioned, having a great trainer, working with someone, is your attitude adjustment. Each trainer here that I work with, each group fitness instructor I work with, and each wellness coach that I work with, have a personal connection. and we share and discuss ways to keep ourselves feeling good. Whether it is, hey, I need a day off or hey, doc, can we sit down and talk? This is what’s going on in my world. I want to work through this so that I have the energy that I need to work with the people. We take time to understand what we need and we give it to others. And a lot of what I do is listen. I listen intently. to empower others to figure out what they need. And in most instances, if there is something positive I can suggest, whether it is taking time out for yourself, or if it is related to eating balanced meals, eating enough, hydrating enough, or sleeping enough, I take time to understand what they need and just offer tips. I call them wise owl wisdom tips. And if they utilize these tips, and some of these we’ll go over today, It makes it easier for our staff here to show up and want to be here and want to greet everyone, no matter what they’re dealing with in their personal lives. Because we all have a personal life. Work is just not what we do. There is another part of what we do, and that’s our personal lives. And what I’ve learned as a leader is our personal lives will either positively or negatively impact our professional lives. And if we understand what we need personally and positively work on that, it will transfer positively in our professional life. And then, of course, people feel good.

Hugh Ballou:
I feel good just talking to you, but there’s more to it. So, wow, that’d be a wild owl wisdom.

Dr. Deidre Douglas:
Wise our wisdom, yes.

Hugh Ballou:
That’s a wow and it’s tips. I want to hear more about that. I want to tag on to one thing about my personal life. This is so important. The burnout rate among non-profit leaders is crisis level. We don’t set time for ourselves. We don’t work on self-care. That’s why this episode is so important for people in the trenches. It’s not about the nuts and bolts or any organization. It’s about you, equipping you. to not burn out. So, I like to read a daily epistle from Father Richard Rohr, who says, that how we do anything is how we do everything. And you are just, a great example. Let’s, okay, you put the teaser out there, let’s talk about this wow, these wow tips.

Dr. Deidre Douglas:
Yes, these wow tips, these are things that I have charted with my own personal growth, professional growth, and I do have a Facebook page that I’m working on, not Facebook, but a YouTube channel that I’m working, and it’s called Wise Owl Wisdom, and it’s taking these tips and sharing them with people. Wise Owl Wisdom focuses on who you are, the boundaries you set for yourself, and how are you meeting your wellness continuum. And so our wellness continuum has a bunch of different if you look at it in terms of a cog, it has a bunch of different segments in it. And it’s about how do we meet our needs emotionally, spiritually, physically, mentally, socially, we have to balance all of these things. Nonprofit leaders sometimes become so laser sharp focused on one thing, which is serving people, that they forget that there are other aspects of the wellness continuum to focus on. So Wise Owl Wisdom helps people look at all of these and see where we are sitting. Some of us, if you look at it in terms of a slice of pie, some of us only have maybe a third or a fourth of the pie and we’re missing the rest. So with Wise Owl Wisdom tips, we wanna see how much time you spend. What percentage of time do you spend socially? How much of the time do you spend on your spiritual development? How much time do you spend on your mental development, your physical, your emotional, familial? We look at all of that. So Wise Owl Wisdom says, look at your wellness continuum, see if you’re balanced, take time to eat, hydrate properly, work out, And then the other thing, sleep. Take time to sleep. Most leaders will sacrifice sleep and food, thinking it’s going to positively impact the greater good. In some cases it does, but you just mentioned it. We burn out. So we have to step back, wise our wisdom, step back and look at those areas of your life and balance things out.

Hugh Ballou:
We’ve heard about boundaries. How about some practical examples of what boundaries are and how we put them in place? And I’m thinking first off is, you know, your office is very visible. You’re very visible. And when I even wave at you, I think, okay, she gets this all the time. So I know it’s important for you to set boundaries physically there, but boundaries with relationships, boundaries with food, and boundaries and carving out time so that we have time to sleep.

Dr. Deidre Douglas:
Yes. So this is, this is interesting because, in Wise Al Wisdom, I’ve started something else. I have a lot of things that I start and I work on and stick with them. One of the things that I’m doing right now with several women who are in their 40s, late 30s, and 40s, is setting boundaries. Number one, setting the boundaries is, I can’t set boundaries. I can’t. I said, well, absolutely, you can. Take a look at how you spend money each month. Don’t you set a boundary on that? Don’t you have a threshold where when you spend this amount, you won’t spend any more? That’s a boundary. And, oh, well, don’t you have a boundary, a limit when you go grocery shopping or shopping on your vacation? You set those boundaries. So, we take that same mindset and we put it into, first, sleep. For example, real-life example for me, I have a boundary of cutting off answering any type of phone call, text message, or email at a certain time. Email stops at 5 p.m. It’s a hard stop. Phone messages, text messages, hard stop, eight. very quickly after social media, hard stop, 8.30. That means if anything comes in within that time unless it comes to me three or four times as an emergency, it can wait until tomorrow. Because that is, what I like to call, recharge time. You know how we take our cell phones and we charge them up? Well, that’s what I’m charging myself up. It’s like unplugging everything. Find quiet time to meditate, read, and do whatever leisure I love to do. Spend 30 to 45, maybe an hour working on that, and then I go to bed. The morning routine starts for me, with prayer. I’m always praying. So I start with prayer, my devotion, and my coffee. and I will start to receive an answer in order, text messages, and phone calls starting at 8 a.m., and emails starting at 9. So when I set that boundary for myself, it allows me time to relax and process information. We are, as humans, the most sophisticated computer that there is, far beyond this platform that we’re on now. And if we take the time to unplug, to recharge, to sleep, then we are okay. So that’s an example of a boundary that I set for myself.

Hugh Ballou:
That’s such a great example because violating any of those has a negative impact that maybe isn’t measurable one time, but over time, it’s significant. It’s significant. That’s so helpful to give those concrete examples. I’m thinking of a couple of things, but let’s talk about if I didn’t commit to be with a trainer that I’m paying for, I might not go to the gym. So talk about how we establish a personal fitness routine. I feel much better when I’m exercising when I’m fit. I’ve run three half marathons, those are in the past, but when I worked up to it and was fit, I felt so much better. So talk about how we set a goal and make sure that it happens with fitness.

Dr. Deidre Douglas:
Oh, that’s so good. I have a friend of mine who is, or she was, shall I say, struggling with, what do I do? What do I do? I don’t want to pay for gym membership. I have this equipment at home. How do I get started? The first Wise Owl Wisdom tip that I shared with her was, to connect with nature. We are born of nature. We thrive in nature. we just need to get out in nature. And she has a horse farm. And I said, just go out and walk. It doesn’t have to be a fast pace. It doesn’t have to be timed per se. It doesn’t have to include using any type of equipment that you have, but just get out in nature and just walk around and observe your surroundings. maybe set a timer for five minutes and be out there. And she did that. She found that each day she increased her time that she was out walking in nature. And then that started the natural inclination to, oh, walking feels good. So she was able to start walking. And then she asked, well, what do I do next? I said, we just choose one other variable to manipulate. Let’s use a set of dumbbells and do body-weight squats. Just do as many as you want. Set a timer for it. Just do that one exercise after you walk. Be done with it. Let’s not overcomplicate things. Keep it simple. And she did that. So I suggest to people, if you don’t have a trainer if you’re not committed to paying a monthly fitness membership or facility membership, just do one or two things that you enjoy at home movement-wise, and it will start to make you feel better, and you’ll want to spend more time doing it. Hugh, oftentimes, we, as a society, want to take on all these things, and we inundate ourselves with so much that it becomes stressful. The last thing we want to do is make exercise stressful. We want to make it fun, engaging, exciting. We want to make it worthwhile. We want it to be the one appointment we never cancel ourselves for. So my tip is to choose one, maybe two things to do five minutes at a time until it becomes a habit.

Hugh Ballou:
My trainer in a way is my accountability partner, but if somebody doesn’t have a trainer, talk about having an accountability partner, but also is going to a group, is that another form of accountability?

Dr. Deidre Douglas:
Yes, group exercise is a great form of accountability. And even in our social circles, in our family circles, we have people who crave the same thing, but sometimes they’re just afraid to say it. So I always tell people, just tell others what you’re thinking of and ask. There are two ways they can answer it. Yes, I’ll join you. No, I won’t. but we’ve not lost anything. We’ve figured out who the people are that wanna do it with us. You know, that there are only two answers to anything. And, you know, when we think about accountability and not having anyone, and this is another topic maybe for another time, is sometimes we create this fear that we need someone else when we have everything we need inside of us.

Hugh Ballou:
God created excellence and just claim it. And it’s being excellent doesn’t mean perfection.

Dr. Deidre Douglas:
Correct.

Hugh Ballou:
Yeah, it’s a big difference there. So, we can always get better. So, I’m inspired. I would go get a trainer, but I already got a trainer. More, are there more wow tips that you want to share with us? It’s intriguing. And you’ve talked a little bit more about that in your YouTube channel. What will people find as you continue to develop that?

Dr. Deidre Douglas:
Yes, yes, yes, yes. So the Wise Owl Wisdom Tips, the WOW Tips, what we will find, and it’s behind the scenes, I think I have one video up now, is you’ll find three different types of things for me. For fitness instructors who follow me globally, you’ll find tips on how to be a better coach with certain activities that we teach and coach in different programs for Les Mills International. So that’s one thing you’ll find. The second thing that individuals will find will be ways to set those boundaries very simply. Tips on what does it mean to set good sleeping habits? What are those boundaries that we need? Boundaries such as You know, the amount of time that we spend working, are we working too much and why? And the third thing we’ll just find is a creative outlet. So I’m a very creative person and I am encouraging people. who are maybe thinking, I don’t know what I want to do with the rest of my life. I’m encouraging them to go back and explore some of the creative outlets that maybe they let go of when they were in their 20s and 30s and reintroduce themselves to those. So you’ll just get to see based on my experience, just a well-rounded way of living life. Just letting go of that fear, because I see that a lot with people. Even here where I work, people are afraid of the what-ifs, and I’m like, but why not? Instead of what-if, it’s why not do that? So we’ll find that here in the future on that YouTube channel.

Hugh Ballou:
Heard it right here, instead of what-if. Why not? We’ve covered a lot of stuff in this interview. We’re coming to the end of it almost. Anything else that you want to share with us? And then I’ll ask you to do a final challenge or a final tip for people before we end in a couple of minutes. But something else you’d like to get on the plate before you get the final tip?

Dr. Deidre Douglas:
I would just like to say, you know, each of us are leaders in our own right. We don’t have to have the title of leader for any organization or any entity that we work with. We are our own leader. And if we understand that we are that we are put on this earth to lead ourselves and to lead others, we can begin to experience the richness that life affords. And it doesn’t have to be from a standpoint of money or lots of friends or lots of accolades. It’s looking at the gifts and talents that we have and letting those come to the forefront. And that’s going to help any leader in any entity positively influence themselves and others.

Hugh Ballou:
That is a period. Dr. Deidre, it’s been such an honor to be listening to you today, and I’m ready to go back, you know, my in-between workouts to work out. So there are so many really good leadership tips here for everybody, no matter where you are, and we’re all leaders. So thank you for that wisdom, and thank you for sharing your secrets and your wisdom and your experience so graciously with our audience today on The Nonprofit Exchange.

Dr. Deidre Douglas:
You’re quite welcome. Thank you.